Day 38: May 8, 2024
What are My Thoughts Today?
I like the idea that fun activities are just plain fun and if we add alcohol and happen to still have fun it's in spite of alcohol, not because of it. I wonder how many times I drank socially and ended up regretting it later, where I could have just gone out and not had the negative consequences.
Looking back, I think one of the bigger negative consequences besides the physical symptoms of coming down from alcohol was the way that, later in the night once we were home, my husband and I were getting stupid and totally avoidable arguments because one or both of us was drinking. Ironically I think I never drew a straight line from that first drink to the dumb fights, but I will be more mindful of that now. If having wine with dinner or beers with friends is inevitably going to lead to a dumb / frustrating argument with my husband 5 hours down the line, maybe that 20 minutes of a euphoric buzz is just not worth it. It's remembering that those two things are linked that is the problem... It's so easy to dismiss that potential for later consequences when you have that first drink.
The truth is, alcohol artificially stimulates the pleasure center in the brain. I guess when you think of it very much like a drug, the buzz sounds less exciting and more hollow or manufactured. Like I'm sure I would feel great on cocaine but I'm just not willing to try it, personally. Any happiness I would feel while high is clearly not authentic happiness; I don't know why alcohol was exempt from the same scrutiny.
Total Number of Drinks since April 1st: 1
My Why: To become more emotionally balanced & happier.
What's One Awesome Thing that Happened Yesterday because I Chose Not to Drink? I could introduce Paul to the pink grapefruit Fever Tree at dinner.
Daily Affirmations:
1) I enjoy freedom from alcohol.
2) I choose to live mindfully.
3) I respect and honor myself.
4) I am worthy of love and care.
5) I give myself patience to heal.
6) I have compassion for others.
7) I create beauty all around me.
